It has come to my attention that I am not giving myself enough quality time. I have plenty of alone and quiet time – but I am acting like some sort of addict – I keep my brain busy with silly stuff that ultimately annoys me.
In retrospect, I cannot believe that I can waste such huge chunks of time – as if I am going to live forever! As if there is more than enough time and money in my bank to support me later in life. And there is a part of me that believes this to be true – that limitations are man made, mentally created – because sure as heck there is a shedload of cash on the planet …. the shortage is only in my mind – currently I am blessed to have a fair bit tucked away – enough for quite a few years less than my possible lifespan!
Do you see what I did there? I wasted more time burbling away to myself and the maybe one or two people who may read this – either on purpose or by stumbling across this blog by accident.
Yesterday I indulged myself for a delicious 20 minute meditation … and I know for sure that it is this level of me-time that I need in order for me to become aware of my future …where I am going, what I am choosing to do. By not meditation quietly, I am only listening to that part of my brain that has very many instructions and comments – You need to create a new career path, you are going to be sorry that you have not moved forward in life, I am so stuck and I cannot see the light at the end of the tunnel …..you know the type of things I am referring to – all the thinking about limitations, dead ends, going nowhere slowly and not enjoying it …..sigh
It’s time to get out my diary and block off one hour a day for me to do nothing – no social media, no fake intelligent pastimes like crosswords, no pottering about doing things that help me to avoid me ….nope, the time has come, the walrus said ….to be more authentic and open to unlimited possibilities …
wish me luck on this new venture …now it is time for me to turn on the light at the end of the tunnel ….